Thursday, 7 April 2011

You get exactly what you expect...

I would like to focus today on the stray thoughts we all have, the judgements we make and how this impacts on situations turning out the way we want them to.

Forgive me please for yet another teaching example...but they're so apt :D

There was this teacher I knew once who had some challenging students in her class. Just prior to each lesson with this class, she would groan out loud and announce to the staffroom that she needed our luck because she was going to this class and knew they would be naughty for her.  It must come as no surprise that she was right. Each lesson became progressively worse, the behaviours escalated, the disruptions continued and she was becoming more and more stressed with the situation. This brings me to three key statements that are closely related...

1. You will always get what you expect (both good and bad)
2. If you think you can or you can''re right
3. Be careful what you wish for.

The point of this example is that the person in question EXPECTED that those students would misbehave...and they did. She ANTICIPATED trouble...and she got it. She thought she COULDN'T teach them, and what's more she verbalised this thought...and she couldn't!

In short, this person created her own nightmare.

I am not saying the students were innocent little lambs, or that she was a bad teacher...that's not the point at all. However, by feeding into her anxieties, and constantly saying them out loud, she MADE THEM HAPPEN.

The same also works in reverse. Expect a situation to become resolved, and it will. Expect confrontation, and you will get it. Expect your goals to be fulfilled, and they will be.

We are in charge of our own situations and our responses to situations. This (for the most part) will determine what happens in our lives.

When manifesting your dreams be assertive (not aggressive) and specific.

Instead of stating, "I want..." try stating, "I have..." Visualise the situation as though it already is the way you want it. Don't phrase your desires as a 'want' or a 'should be' but as an 'is'.

I have been known to make a statement to students on occasion who demand things in "I want" terms;
"Miss, I want to have free time now,"
"Yes, and I want you to finish your work first. I guess we'll both be disappointed."
They get it very quickly. A "want" can be ignored, an "is" cannot.

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