The instructions I am given

I am always being given fantastic advice and instructions from the divine. These are sometimes in the nature of dreams, impulses, intuition (for want of a better word), dreams, repeated signs, songs, so-called "coincidences" and a range of other things.

I would LOVE to tell you I always listen to and follow those instructions and advice *sheepish grin* but I don't make a habit out of lying, even on seemingly little things! 

Needless to say, those times when I haven't listened, I soon discover why it would have been to my advantage to do so... *Wry grin*

The ones I really want to focus on tonight is the information I am constantly getting from my body. The simple version is, that every part of me, every fibre, tissue, cell, molecule, understands the connection to the divine that we all have. It KNOWS the contract, knows what's best for me, and the choices that would equal perfect and divine health. It is my connection to both the earth, and the divine all in one.

Last Thursday, I had to have some surgery (don't worry, sparing you the details) and as circumstances were at the time, I had to go on my own, staying overnight in a hotel as the hospital is a three hour drive each way from where I live. When I arrived, I found I had been given little to no information, was being condescended to and treated as the body part being dealt with rather than as a human being. That there was limited compassion and a WHOLE lot of judgement. As the day progressed (It had started at 4am when I had hit the road to get to the place) I became increasingly more distressed. I called on the whole team to be there, Raphael in particular. I was OK, but certainly not fantastic. 

As I sat waiting in the common waiting area, dressed in my ultra attractive surgical gown I began to have second thoughts about the whole deal. Raphael calmly informed me that "chickening out" was not really an option (damn!) I was moved to the pre-op area to wait for someone to come and give me the initial bout of chemicals and there was a picture on the wall of a path leading through a forest. As I sat there, I imagined walking through the forest with Raphael having a chat about the procedure and the after procedure care and all of the things I was frightened about.

At one point, I asked about all of the pain and the anti-biotic and other drugs I had been told I MUST take and the like. I live a reasonably natural existence, using herbs to treat most things, and was reluctant to take any chemical drugs, although I was certainly not going to refuse western treatment or any thing like that.

Raphael challenged me to heal myself! 

As I went into the surgery, all I could think about was how I could heal myself????????

After the operation, as I was lying on the bed in my hotel room, it suddenly "came to me" that I could just ask my body to heal itself. "What a strange idea" I thought to myself, but as I thought that (with my brain) my heart said, "Go on, can't hurt any worse than you do right now can it?" So, I set myself to the task of imagining a discussion with every cell in my body *laugh* This may have been made easier with the after effects of a general anaesthetic. I gave every cell the instruction that energy was to be converted to the place of surgery; that it was ALL hands on deck and the wound needed to be pain free and healing and ready for the three hour car trip home the next day. I also issued orders that I was to be fit for work on the following Monday. I went to sleep smiling to myself and laughing at what a "silly goose" I was.

I have been virtually pain free since the surgery, I have not taken the anti-biotic chemicals, instead using calendular and ginger (naturally occurring anti-biotic) because that's what my body said would be OK. No infection, and...a week later, other than some bruising, absolutely no evidence that I had the surgery at all.

Knock me over with a feather! That ACTUALLY worked *laugh*

I am of course, not suggesting that anyone ignore medical advice, or not seek treatment of they need to. After all, Raphael suggested the visit which led to the need for surgery being discovered. (Just as an aside, I also asked him to take care of finding me a really good specialist too *smile*) What I am saying is, that within each of us, is a most amazing and powerful tool; an unbelievably strong connection to the divine. Every cell in your body is attuned and waiting for your permission.

Give yourself permission to be powerful and hear the instructions you are given! Honour the voice inside of you that tells you what course to take...it's the divine, you can trust it.

With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Committment

Often over the last few days I have had cause to look at the things I am committed to and also the process through which I make commitments.

Obviously, (or maybe not to some) the commitments we make to ourselves should be our first priority. It is when we are ignoring these commitments, or haven't made any at all, that the world starts to unravel a bit.

I LOVE my friends, I really do, they are more than just friends, they share a part of me that not everyone gets to see. However, I also know, that at times, totally unbeknown  to them, they can take advantage of me. This is not a malicious and nasty thing, in fact, if we were to play the blame game (not one I choose actually) then it would be all down to me since we teach people how to treat us. It is through me saying "yes" when I feel "no" and vice versa, that these things happen.

Periodically, and it seems now is one of those times, *smile* I take time to review the commitments I am making to myself. One of the ways I choose to do this is to sit down with pen and paper and write a set of wedding vows to me. Sounds weird? Think about it this way, wedding vows are the commitments you make to a person you love with your whole heart, body and soul; they are the most important person in your world and you wish to publicly acknowledge that right? Otherwise, why would you marry them? Well then, YOU are the same, precious and beloved being and your commitment to yourself should be no less heartfelt and genuine.

In neglecting this part of our contract with ourselves and our divine team, we are expressing to the universe that what we want, what we need and who we are don't matter as much as other people! This is not the message I wish to send out. The result is that people will inadvertently  and overtly take advantage of us and ask more than we are willing to give.

So, on that note, I am going to sit down right now and write those vows to myself, starting with some REALLY important ones:

• I promise to respect my personal boundaries, acknowledge that I am a perfect and divine being and that I have the right to say "no" when I need to without feeling guilty.
• I promise to believe that what I need and who I am is important and to take time out for myself.
• I promise to only say positive things about myself and show the highest regard for me as a person.
• I promise to forgive myself when I make mistakes, and know that next time, I will do the very best I can.
• I promise to acknowledge that while sometimes I do not live up to my own expectations, that I am doing the best I can do with the current skills I have, and I will not punish myself.

There are more, but I thought I would share the ones at the top of my list.

With love and light

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

When the world fell out from beneath me

I am not scared to admit that the last few days have been pretty bloody terrible for me energetically. I had a fantastic day at work all day on Wednesday, lovely times with my students, lots of learning, a few moments of confrontation but nothing extreme. Over all, a pleasant day with nothing untoward going on. Suddenly, in the last few minutes of the day, a moment happened (nothing big, no real issue) and my stomach plummeted. I got in my car to drive home, smudging for all my heart was worth in order to let go of the moment and move passed it. After all, it was NOTHING in the big scheme of things. It wasn't even anything in the little scheme of things, it was a moment that I would pass by on any given day of the week with never a backward glance. All of a sudden though, I couldn't let it go. I drove home, my stomach really sore, my brain working over time to come up with all sorts of scenarios, each more horrible than the last. ...whoa..."what is going on?" I asked my divine team over and over again to cut the cords tying me to this situation and help me move on and past it....nothing.

I walked in the door at home and got smashed by a second round of moments. My heart leaped immediately into my throat, I was almost crying with frustration and despair...holy cow! "So what bought this on?" ...nothing.

Major conflict in the house for a while, so after putting my youngest angelic being to bed, I went out to the garden which is usually a place of serenity  calm and comfort. I made myself comfortable on my favourite chair and began all my relaxation methods and calming exercises. I asked my team to back me up, and with all my will I focused my intentions on being centred  being calm and figuring out what in all of creation was going on!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I couldn't concentrate on reading my book, found no beauty in my plants and faery lights, was restless, my tea tasted horrible and I could not hear the usual comfort and solace of my team surrounding me...."what?????"

No matter what I did, no matter how I did it, I could find no peace, none of my inner strength was manifest, no calm, no serenity, no distance...nothing.

I had NO idea what to do next. I knew I could not sit down to write a blog post in the state I was in, I didn't even know what was going on myself. I didn't want to talk to anyone, I mean, how do you explain it when a beautiful, fluffy, faery filled day all of a sudden, for no reason, feels like you've landed in the seven circles of hell?????? No reason!!!!!

What I ended up doing was just sitting with the feeling. I continued to sit in the garden and let the feeling wash over me, surround me and completely envelop me. I took ownership of the moment, after all, this was me in this moment, this is how I felt and no amount of denial could remove that fact or the feeling. I can't say I embraced the feeling (who would???) however, I stopped trying to figure it out or to find a solution to it. I just sat with it, with me, and let the moment unfold as it would, tears and all....then, I went to bed.

That was two days ago now. To this moment, I cannot tell you what happened or why, I just don't know. I don't understand the why or the how, I did learn from this moment though. I accepted the feelings as my own, coming from me and a part of me and stopped trying to control the moment (an exercise in futility). I felt a real crisis, and just knew that all I had to do was surrender and I would pass through the moment....hard work!!!!!!!! I constantly talked to my divine team, seeking their help, asking for assistance and it was great. Since I did not know the cause of this moment, I could not ask for specific things to "be done" only surrender to guidance, stumbling my way through, listening as hard as I could to hear the "answers" I was being given.

I have walked through the last two days as though one half asleep, fulfilling my obligations to home and work, but not really here. Listening hard to my heart and the universe, going the direction guided, a bit here, a little more there, don't engage with this, leap right into that.

Suddenly this morning, the feeling was gone and I felt expectant hope again.

I still can't tell you what happened, or what that was all about. I can tell you that this moment passed with little pain due to the fact that I surrendered myself up completely and let go of the need to control the outcome (not that I had a great deal of choice in the matter *wry grin*) 

With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Horrible moments

Sometimes I have days where I seem to be overtaken by unbearable heart hurt, loss, grief, loneliness and all sorts of heart wrenching emotions. Sometimes there seems to be a cause, other times, not. Sometimes I think I am the only person in the world....*ego much? wry grin*

On these days I find myself judging others...generally the heart hurt comes from observing the actions of others (or experiencing them myself) and I find a bit of a rage building at the way humans CHOOSE to treat each other. I am then a little disappointed and saddened at my own choice...that of judgement.

Coping with one of these days is interesting.

Most of the time I make the conscious choice to go "switch off". This is not a "sticking your head in the sand" kind of moment, it's more like a, "I choose to reserve all response until the energy changes" kind of response.

I keep myself busy doing loving and worthwhile things (in my perception of course) and each time my brain tries to inject negativity, anger, judgement or anything else, I stop, take a deep breath and clear my head. 

I mow the lawn (and the neighbours lawn too) I create culinary delights, I read, I draw, I clean the house...basically I focus all of my energy and channel my intent into doing something, it doesn't really matter what.

For really "bad" days I prefer to focus on physical activities (ones that don't actually involve sport...not the sporting type *smile*) , especially in the garden. I feel better when I exercise out the feelings rather than sitting with them and dwelling on them. There is ZERO point in meditating quietly on these days (not for me anyway) so I get into the garden and weed and mow and water and plant and talk to the veggies depositing all of the negativity and "stuff" at their roots, asking them to change it into love energy before releasing it again. (A VERY helpful visual for me).

Dwelling on how "bad" you feel only makes it worse!

While keeping busy doing "stuff" may not change the reason you feel heart hurt, it does help you to focus your attention on something else. The laws of the universe state that what you focus the most on, is what you get more of...so I choose to distract myself from negative thoughts.

With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Needing approval

It is through trying to meet someone else's approval or a set of standards or some other arbitrary thing that I have MOST often found myself floundering and in some sort of difficulty. The need for approval is a behaviour I learnt early on in life, and in fact it is something we are conditioned to from an early age. I never wanted to be in trouble, I never wanted to disappoint people or let them down, and therefore, it has taken me a long time to figure out that it was/is often this need for another person's approval that has led me to paths I may not have otherwise trod.

This concept, this freedom is something that is new to me. So I'm sorry, no profound words of wisdom yet on exactly how to release the need for the approval of others...I have only just recently myself, remembered that this can be so freeing.

In seeking the approval of others we forget something really important...WE are our own best judge of what will suit our journey and what will not, and that information is already inside each of us.

With love and light
xoxoxoxoxo

Being strong...

One of the most difficult life lessons for me has been in those moments in time when I really should be allowing myself to show "weakness" (as I perceive it) and giving others the opportunity to help me, that I insist on "being strong."

In actual fact, this is not strong, and it's not even particularly intelligent...if it goes on too long, it is quite possibly harmful as well.

The lesson for me, is the fact that knowing my own boundaries, knowing where to draw the line in helping others and in having time for myself and my own needs is not only beneficial, but essential!!!

Knowing that I have reached the limit of what I am actually capable of doing without harm to myself, and loving and respecting myself enough to say "no, with all the love in my heart, no" is a life skill I was slow to learn, and one I am still actually working on.

There is a sense of "selfishness" and "guilt" and a whole heap of other humanly constructed emotive responses that flit across my conscious mind in these moments. 

I have had to/and sometimes still have to, ask for some divine assistance in order to put a lid on the guilt, shame and sense of selfishness in order to take the time I need to do what I need to do for me and to say "no" to the people who perceive they need me.

At times, I have even gone as far as to break an agreement with another person in order to look after myself. That is, I have said I will help with this bake sale, or I will show up to that public appearance or whatever the case may be, and I have had to call and cancel. This is also very difficult for me.

The end result though is that if you continue to do things just because you said you would, because you would feel guilty or selfish if you didn't or some other form of obligation then I am not giving a gift of my time and services....only resentment can grow.

With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

The benefits of stillness and silence

I am often so busy that when I get time to myself, I don't really know what to do with it...a million and one projects, incomplete tasks, "obligations" and many other things instantly pop into my brain and then I attempt to choose between them since alone time is usually limited. The "task" I get the most benefit from and try to have/do most often, is to sit in silence with myself, in the stillness of my garden.


Initially, when there is silence, my brain tries to fill the space and goes in all different directions at once. I let my brain wander through things for a bit since this is a good way of determining the specific things I need to let go of, however, after a few minutes, I ask my brain to be still and open the floor to my heart. *smile* I know the difference now between my head and my heart when I hear them through one important aspect. My brain usually takes me to negative, uncomfortable, embarrassing or hurtful places; rehashing things I would rather let go of, inducing me to feel all over again the way the moment had me feeling when it happened. My heart, on the other hand, takes me to joy, love, bright and shinning future images, creativity and positivity. 


This is one of my primary connections with my divine team, where I get answers, where I have the opportunity to ask the questions, and to immerse myself in the loving comfort of the divine.


When you're so engaged in the business of your life, you can forget sometimes the amazing benefits of silence and stillness in nourishing your soul and reconnecting you with the divine.


With love and light
xoxoxoxoxooxox

Recognise your value

There is a great  danger inherent in attributing your sense of self, your confidence and your value based on the opinion of others, whether they be people who love and cherish you, or people who are less than friendly, or even people you don't know.


Just by being the person you are, with all the things that make up you, you are contributing something valuable to the world. Every breath you take, and every time your heart beats, your love energy contributes to the whole.


You are a valuable person this planet, and  it's people and all that is in it, needs you and the gifts you have to offer. It is not necessary to be anyone else, who you are is more than enough, it is perfect. 
You may never know the people you positively influence, you may never truly realise the small but invaluable gifts you give others, you may even be surprised at how many celebrate the fact you are  a part of their lives.


Just remember that you are loved, that the only opinion that counts is your own. Keep faith and believe in your ability to be the perfect you...this is all that is required.


Let go of the need to be anyone other than who you are.


With love and light
xoxoxoxoxo

Loneliness

There are times when I feel really alone in the world; these moments are not often (thankfully *smile*) and they are usually short lived, but still, it is pointless to pretend as though they don't exist. 


Sometimes it feels as though I haven't a friend in the world, I mean, I know lots of people and I live in a great little community, but it seems as though I don't actually have people whom I can just drop in on, or randomly ask for a hug *laugh*


There are moments where I think maybe there is no one in the world who understands (or wishes to) the way I see the world and the way I am.


This is NOT a post of self pity *smile* so bear with me while the point actually arrives!


During these infrequent moments, a few things become REALLY obvious to me.


Firstly, I come to understand the impact that kindness has on others. When I am involved in a moment like this one, the smallest thing, the simple courtesy, or the unexpected smile becomes magic! I come to understand that those random acts have immense meaning and I realise the function that I perform for all others around me.


Secondly, I realise and fully understand that most people are uncertain how to respond when someone they see and perceive as enthusiastic, happy, optimistic and as the "strong one" has as moment when they don't actually feel any of these things. It is really simple; all the things they would do for you if the situation was reversed *smile* The most important thing is listening.


Thirdly, I understand that these moments, where it seems like there is not another soul alive who cares or really "sees" who I am, is actually an opportunity for me to spend some quality time with myself, understanding the benefit of silence, not being able to "fill" the spaces with talk, activity or anything else, allows me to see clearly that some healing is required and what that might be.


Finally, and MOST importantly, I remember and renew my understanding of the fact that NEVER do I stand completely alone. When these moments come upon me, I feel my divine team of angelic beings all the more strongly. I "hear" more clearly, I "see", I "feel" and I know more than at any other time, that I am a loved and divine being who is completely and unconditionally supported in all that I do.


So when a moment of complete vulnerability and loneliness comes upon me, I cannot see this as a negative. It is a part of being human to feel this way sometimes; and during these moments, I remember so many valuable things.


What you think, how you feel, the moments that come and go...they are all a part of you, and therefore, they are the perfect way to be in the moment in which you feel them.


With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxo

What do you present to the world?

Each and every day we present a "face" to the world; through our attitude, the way we treat others, the words we use, the way we deal with any and all situations. 


In that languid space between coming awake and getting out of bed I make a decision. I offer thanks for all the things in my life that inspire gratitude, I smile as the day begins and ask the help of my divine team to approach the world with positivity, love, forgiveness and light.


I get out of bed and begin the day's "work" and from this moment am aware, that every action, nuance and gesture are informing the people around me and in some way creating an influence.


You see, I know that attitudes are contagious. I know that I have the ability to influence those around me and the way in which that influence manifests itself is my choice. People I interact with daily will catch my enthusiasm and pass it on...


I choose to begin each and every day with thankfulness and a smile. I walk into the world each day projecting that gratitude and love for life even when (in fact especially when ) I am being challenged by circumstances and situations around me. 


No matter what my current situation is, I am alive, I am able to do most anything, and I have so many beautiful souls around me...what more do I need?


With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Moving through

So often in our lives we are moving. To here, from there, around there, moving on, moving in...well, I am sure you get the picture *laugh* 


I think one of our body's ways of dealing with "stuff" is to actually get us moving. you know those days when you haven't time to sit down and take five minutes out for yourself. I know I had a day like that just recently, where each time I turned around there was something I "had" to do, or someone who wanted me to go somewhere and do something or just to walk with them. Not a moment was I able to stop and just be, not even my lunch break. 


As it turns out, and I don't believe it was coincidence, this was also a day where I was to be confronted by a whole heap of "stuff" I don't usually choose to associate with. As I opened my mouth to say something VERY human in response, I got the impulse to just move. I couldn't walk away, so I stepped sideways and actually felt better. "Interesting" I thought to myself. When the situation was over, I went for a walk to the other end of the school because I felt I wanted to "get" something. When I got to the place I was going, I couldn't remember why I went, but I did feel better. "curiouser and curiouser." I then began to take note of all the situations and moments that seemed to be filling this particular day and I realised that each time I found myself in a situation I was not really enjoying, had the potential to anger me or that may possibly have created a moment I would have not chosen ordinarily for myself...my body moved. Sometimes imperceptibly to others like a slight shift in my stance of body position. Sometimes really obviously like being "sent" on a walk with no actual purpose.


Our bodies are incredibly intuitive and in this day, I was being shown a great way of moving on from something that was occurring; quite literally as it turns out *smile*


Physically moving is good for us in so many ways, I'm not really a sporting type, so I don't actually have the specific knowledge to pass on to you about that. What I do know, is that physically moving my body helped me pass through these less than desirable moments without being affected.


With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Being true to yourself

I have heard the term, "be true to yourself" quite a large number of times over the course of my journey. People have said it to me, I have read it and I have heard it whispered in the depth of my mind...but...what does this actually mean and how is it helpful on the days where we are struggling at times, to find even one reason to "bother" about it all?


The power of this statement is missed sometimes I think, because of how simply it is stated.


Being true to yourself can mean so many things and also means the absence of so many things as well. It is quite a complex concept so bare with me as I try to muddle my way through it *smile*


Before you can even think about being true to yourself, you have to know who that is. The first step in being true to yourself then is taking some time to get to know who that person is, to listen to the whispers of your heart, to set boundaries of ways you choose to and choose not to behave and be, to know every part of you inside and out without judgement (bam...there's the tough bit *laugh*) and love and accept who you are and choose to be. (There are earlier posts that go into this in a bit more detail if you want to scroll back and have a look for them for more information)


Basically, to be true to yourself you have to know the difference between the whisperings of your heart and divine self, and the whisperings of your brain and ego...the conditioned human self. At the very least, make a beginning on this understanding.


One thing I want to point out really strongly though, is that being true to yourself does NOT mean you are selfish! For some reason, this concept gets all mixed up with the idea of sacrifice of self being equal to "goodness". Occasionally it is helpful to define something, by saying what it is not. Being true to yourself and following your heart does not mean that you are a selfish person. In fact, quite often, listening to the calling of my heart leads me to completing acts of service to and for others, this does not make me anything other than true to the being I chose to be. It just is. 


Being true to yourself is acting, being and thinking in a way that does NOT contradict the person you make a choice to be, it's not selfish, it's respectful.


Being true to yourself means that you spend your time and choose your actions according to your heart not what others expectations of you may or may not be. Being true to yourself means consciously knowing who you are and never acting to contradict that (even when you perceive that to do so will benefit others). Being true to yourself means that you live a life that brings you joy and therefore helps your loving and divine self shine on the world. When you smile, you change the world around you, when you laugh, you bring others along for the ride and make a difference to them too.


Being true to yourself means NEVER lying to yourself about what you need, want, think, desire, will and won't accept, or anything else for that matter. If you wouldn't do "it" to others, then you won't do it to yourself either. It means living in love and from your heart...simple huh? *smile*


With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxox


P.S. This concept was inspired by an earth angel asking me to write to this topic. If you want to ask me my thoughts on a topic (remembering this is only my opinion and not set in concrete *laugh*) feel free to leave a comment, or pop on over to the Angel Wings and Faery Dust Face Book page and leave a message/comment there. xo

Taking fear head on...

OK, so yesterday's post was about one of the ways I use my own tricky, fear mongering brain to out wit itself when it comes to fear. However, that is only one strategy of many that I use.


One of the things that has helped me over come fear and to step forward boldly on my chosen path is to really understand what fear means to me.


There is what I call "real" fear. This is your bodies defence mechanism that lets you know when you are in danger. Your body will release certain chemicals and give you signals and collect information from a thousand sources to let you know that you are in physical danger. I don't ignore these kinds of instinct, I get well and truly out of the way of anything that causes this response. I trust my body and the instinct it has developed over centuries of trial and error to know how to keep me physically safe.


Then, there is the fear that is generated by my brain, the fear that tells me I cannot achieve what I want to, that I am not worthy, that something will go wrong, that the risks are too high and that I may fail. This kind of fear, has NO place in my life. This is the fear I have developed methods of exorcising from my thinking. I am not always successful, and sometimes I have to try many different methods before one will work, but more often than not, I am now able to circumvent those fears and free myself to follow my heart rather than listening to the fear my brain uses to self-sabotage.


Someone said to me once that fear is actually False Evidence Appearing Real. In other words, all those "what if" and "worse case" scenarios that all of a sudden pop into my brain every time I imagine trying something new; focusing on these things, makes them seem real, when in fact, they are nothing more than a figment of my brain.




Strategy number two for not letting fear stop me from attempting anything my heart desires....


Any time I dream up something I wish to achieve, I take a moment to sit and think on it in some quiet, uninterrupted, out of the way place. I take some deep breaths and focus all of my thoughts and intentions on the situation then let thoughts flow through my head in whatever order they appear. My rule of thumb is really simple when filtering through , these thoughts to determine whether I take the action or throw myself into the situation...


...if the thoughts are negative, if they are thoughts about how I "can't," or how everything may "go wrong", then my brain is in charge and is feeding the fear. Thus those thoughts are baseless fears with no evidence to back them up and I can discard them.  If the thoughts are positive, point out the challenges without "mentioning" that they are insurmountable...then the thoughts are heart driven.


Knowing that words have power, I write down, and reinforce the thoughts that are positive, solution driven and that give me food for thought. I ignore and thus dismiss anything that is negative, tells me I can't or makes me think I shouldn't even try.


This takes practise and discipline. Practise to sort through those different thoughts, and discipline to ignore the negative and hold yourself to the path you have chosen no matter how scary it may seem. The fear is an illusion, yet sometimes it seems convincing...this is why it takes discipline.


I also have a great group of fear busting friends who are there to support me when my discipline slips. These friends let me know when I am starting to believe the illusion and remind me to get back on track by believing in myself.


You don't have to be stopped by fear. It is an illusion, albeit a sometimes convincing one. Arm yourself by listening to your heart and stealing yourself to walk through the illusion no matter how convincing it may seem.


With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo


P.S. For those of you who may have read yesterday's post called, "Using fear to release yourself from fear," I just wanted to let you know that I did indeed sing the anthem at today's ceremony, and to my delight, the students and staff joined in and sang with me. Although I missed a few noted and my voice shook with nerves at the beginning, ALL of the students congratulated me, told me I had a nice voice and warmly thanked me for singing. My boss put his hand on my arm and told me the singing was beautiful and that I was, "Full of surprises." I didn't forget the words, I didn't fall over, or have any other mishap; it was perfect and from my heart.
xoxoxox

Use fear to release yourself from fear

Sounds a bit like a contradiction doesn't it? Bare with me though.


If your fear manifests itself in situations that you feel may leave you embarrassed, helpless, alone, or anything other than actually in danger...then this is a great strategy you may find useful.


It's your brain that creates the fear and makes you feel afraid of doing, being or trying something especially if it's new. It is your heart that leads you along the life path you chose. So, what I do is give my brain free reign when I start to feel fear. My brain is incredibly talented at coming up with all of the "terrible" and embarrassing things that may happen if I "take a chance." 


"Well then, " I say to my brain, "Go for your life, give me what you've got, the BEST you've got." My very human, non-heart driven brain leaps at the chance with unbridled enthusiasm. All of a sudden I start imagining singing the national anthem at the ANZAC ceremony for school and falling over, forgetting the words, having a clothing malfunction in front of my students (*aaarrrggggg) and all of the other assorted things that may happen. I'm not content with this performance by my brain though, "Is that it? That's all you've got? Seriously?" I tell my brain, and away it goes again imagining even MORE embarrassing and silly things that may happen, I trip and fall, loose my place, forget the words, sing off key, trip and fall on top of a student, throw my hand out for the big finale and accidentally hit the boss who's sitting behind me, somehow getting caught in the flag and it rips from the pole and twists around me making me have a panic attack, then ..... "Oooohh, that's not bad," I tell my brain, "got anything else?"


hmmmm....brain seems to be a little stymied because somewhere along the line of this wild imagining about the potential disasters that could befall me as I stand there tomorrow and proudly, from my heart and with love I sing the national anthem to show respect for the men and women who died to protect my freedom and my right to sing, to instill that respect and understanding in our youth through the power of my voice, I forgot to be afraid anymore. I was having too much fun thinking about all the hilariously amusing combinations I can think of. All of a sudden, the reason I wanted to sing came to the front, the belief and passion I feel forced it's way to the for of my brain's considerations and my heart went, "YES! In your face brain." *laugh*


Sometimes this doesn't work for me, I'll be honest, and I find another way to bring my heart to the fore and shove my brain back into the self sabotaging box it came out of, but in a great majority of cases, letting my brain have free run on imagining the MOST embarrassing, the BIGGEST humiliations and the WORST case scenario it can, actually highlights for me that I have nothing to lose.


You know what, even if I do fall on my face tomorrow, forget the words or sing off key, my heart still won the battle and that's what counts, and really, if that's the worst that can happen...so what? I get embarrassed for a few minutes, then have something to laugh about in my next class.


With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Who do you answer to?

I know that we all have obligations, commitments we make to others in our lives, our friends, our families; but, who do you answer to really? 


There have been so many times that I find myself feeling bad about something someone else has said, feeling less than, feeling unvalued, unbeautiful, selfish and so many other things.


When these things happen, when for a moment, I am made to feel less than because others have made a judgement about me through some set of criteria which I don't know about or don't ascribe to, I ask myself the question, "Who do you answer to?"


I answer to me...I am the one that has to look myself in the mirror every day, I am the one who has to accept my choice of behaviour and my way of being, I am the one who has permission to make judgements and to offer forgiveness if necessary...no one else on the human plane!


I answer to a far higher power than other humans being human. I answer to my divine team (who love me unconditionally and NEVER act to make me feel less) and I answer to me (I sometimes act to make myself feel less, but do my level best to avoid this trap).


So, my inner response when someone makes a judgement about me is, "Whatever!" My outer response?


Silence...I give them nothing in return for their judgement...for nothing is what it is worth.


With love and light,and too much self love to let the opinion of others affect me for long
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Relax, you're safe!

I wonder through life at the moment finding that there is nothing that can make me mad, I mean truly mad, not just annoyed for a minute, there is nothing that can make me feel guilt, shame or any of those other very human emotions. There is nothing that has the power or ability to shatter my calm and my sense of balance....


...when I realise this, I went, "HOLY COW! WOOOOHOOOOO!"... *laugh*


So, then I get to wandering how this could be, since there are plenty of reasons I could be stressed, could be angry and frustrated, have the potential to be embarrassed or guilty about. So.....what's the go?


Then, I hear this little voice whisper to me, "relax, you're safe." I took a really deep breath, I closed my eyes for a brief moment and revelled in the warm and fuzzy feeling creeping down from my head to my toes! "That's right," I reminded myself. 


You see, it is really hard to get upset, angry, frustrated, embarrassed, guilty or fearful when you KNOW there are an entire team of angels and divine beings, a beautiful Earth and Universal spirit that is looking out for me. With all that I am learning (and sharing) I have no idea why I was momentarily surprised that I was not being impacted by negativity any more.


This is the power of hope, faith, trust and belief. No matter what you choose to call your spiritual connection; if you place your trust and faith in it and choose belief and a deep love of yourself over martyrdom and denial of the beauty that is uniquely you...WOW...amazing the power, confidence and tranquillity that is the result.


Follow your heart, follow the promptings of your intuition and relax, you are safe.


With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxo

Making comparisons

There are two really BIG things that annoy me when I am teaching. The main one, is when people (and unfortunately not always the students) make comparisons related to progress. While I know this is a part of the process, it can be (if done badly) be also a massive part of the problems.


This same thing is true when we start to compare ourselves, our progress, our journey and our success with that of others! Aside from this being an "unfair test", which in Science terms means that all the variables are not controlled or the same for each test group; it is also an exercise in futility. You CANNOT accurately compare yourself, your thoughts, your successes, your looks or anything else about the MANY parts of you with the MANY parts of someone else.


When I am demonstrating an art technique, occasionally my students will say something like, "Mine looks like crap compared to yours Miss, I'll never be as good as that." My first response is to say, "You're right, you won't be, because you just said it and will make it so." The second thing following quickly after the first is to say, "I have been drawing and making for as long as I can remember, I have studies for three years to gain an arts degree and have been teaching art for another 12 years as well as my own private practise. How on EARTH could you, with your ten years of mostly unguided practise, have the same level of skill as I do? That would make you the teacher and me the student." Not very gentle I know, but the gentle approach on this one makes the students think you are just saying their work is good because you're paid to; so, on this one, it's a boots and all lesson *smile* Teenagers are smart, they very quickly get the point which is, "It is impossible to compare our level of skill in any way that might be called remotely accurate."


The same is true of all facets of our lives. No one is completely honest, rarely will people share all of the miserable moments they have experienced. More often than not, people share their highlights. So it should be too! I would much rather focus my time and energy on the positives, and I would much rather hear the positives from others as well.


What I am trying to remind everyone of is the FACT that we are all influenced in different ways by different things every minute of every day since birth. ALL of these influences add together to make up who we are and what choices we make, therefore, there is no way we can compare these things...ever.


The only person with the right to make judgements about you, is YOU (and even then, why?????) The only person you can compare yourself with is YOU. Look at where you are now, and look back ten years and see the amazing distance you have travelled. Remember this when you next go to compare yourself with someone else...what they have achieved (or not achieved) has NOTHING to do with your own journey. You simply cannot compare.


You are you, a precious gift to the world, and the ONLY one of your kind. If for no other reason, this reason alone makes you special, treasured and successful. So, just concentrate on being you...it is enough


With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxox

The BIGGEST and BEST secret of all time!

OK, so are you ready to hear the ONE secret to my success; to my transformation from a "victim" mentality and a person living in their ego, to someone who focuses on the positive and is living the life I choose rather than just letting "stuff" happen???


I'll pause for a minute while you go and get pen and paper, you're not going to want to miss this one *smile*


The key secret to my success is:


1. Accepting that I need to repeat skills and activities to make them permanent, over and over and over and over again sometimes. This means that I don't punish myself when I don't get it on the first try and need to do it again. This also means I can have patience with myself on the journey.


...and....


2. I start again if I feel I have "failed". I make no excuses, I take responsibility for my actions however, I will NEVER allow that one so called "failure" means I will never get it and I should quit now.


So, there it is, that is it!


I know sometimes, when you are reading these posts, you might come to the conclusion of, "Yeah right, it may be just that easy for you, but you know nothing about me." Or, alternatively, something along the lines of, "My situation is so much worse than anyone else's, that won't work for me." Do you know why I know these thoughts may be present occasionally? Well, it's because I have had those same thoughts myself when someone passed information and learning to me. What I learnt about myself in that moment? (as hard as it may have been to admit) I learnt that I was looking for excuses for my failure rather than reasons for continuing the journey.


There is no definitive time in which you need to have all of these skills, in fact, there are no particular skills you MUST have either. This journey is your journey and the only one who determines time frame is you. Be persistent, you are worth the energy it takes to move each step forward. If you "fail" (only a perception) the it just means that you start again tomorrow that's all.


With love and light

I just had to add this picture from Intuitive Coaching's Face Book page.

xoxoxoxoxo

Choosing

Often on my journey I have used (and sometimes still do) tools to help me to move further on and maintain balance. Tools such as crystals, herbal teas, incense, candles and other things like this.


Rarely have I used guide books and the like to choose those things I needed at the time. I thought perhaps it was laziness or some form of deficit on my part that I just cannot make myself remember what the "meaning" or "proper use" of each of these things are. In actuality, not being bound by someone else's opinion about the "proper" use of different things, has actually left me free to use my instinct.


For each person there is an individualised set of rituals, items, prayers...whatever...that will work to help in making you feel better, move on, find balance or just be. Each path is unique to each person and there is definitely no right or wrong way to deal with anything spiritual. Most of the time now, I don't even use these things any more, in this part of my journey, I don't need "things" to help me, just the power of choice and thought combined with my team and following my instincts.


Whatever you need, whatever you feel in your heart and in your gut, you will never go wrong, never pick the wrong crystal, oil, incense, candle, book etc. when you let instinct guide you.


Feel free to look up the uses, or suggested purpose for these things if you wish, however, I suggest strongly that if you chose it, that is exactly the right tool for the job, especially if you let your heart and body decide rather than your brain, so if the "official description" does not match what you felt when you chose it, this doesn't matter, go with your choice anyway....undoubtedly you are right!


With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxo

Purging (again)

I am constantly reminded how when we are purging our physical space (cleaning and sorting and throwing out) we are also clearing away all the cords attached to those things and to the space. Our home space is really important, it is where we rest, recuperate and sleep...if for no other reason, this space needs to be cleared constantly. The great thing about cleaning is that it really requires no skills or specific set of instructions to do well (actually I believe this of all things relating to the spiritual...we don't need instructions, if it feels like the right thing to do, and it is done with love, then it is).


This morning, I woke with the feeling and insistent urging that it was time for a BIG clean. I sat down for my morning cup of tea and nearly had my toes bitten off by my little gremlin slayer, Whiskers. (If you'd like to read more about her, I wrote a post a couple of days ago relating to "My cat; the gremlin slayer) I got the hint; NOW!


I got out of my chair and began work. There was no system, no methodology, I went from room to room picking up, sorting out, throwing out, dusting and purging. Whiskers went with me "attacking" invisible things as we went. As I moved something away from the wall to clean behind it, she waited with the "I'm hunting" look on her little feline face. As soon as I moved the object far enough for her to squeeze in, in she went, dashing about madly, emerging after a few minutes covered in cobwebs and dust. In I went after her with broom, vacuum and mop. *laugh* it was such a fun game. 


After about 2 hours, the house was done (Since I have a small house and do this kind of clean every couple of months, we made short work of it)


My space feels SO much better, it smells of pine (I use pine oil, vinegar and water to clean) the warm autumn air has cleared out all the corners, (I live in the tropics), and I can sit down to type with a feeling of being refreshed and energised!


All things can carry attachments for us whether good or not so good. In the act of removing or rearranging the objects, we change our association with them. In doing this, we renew our contract and all past transactions go along with it. Each day I begin my contract anew, each night I cut ties to everything (even the positive things) that have happened during the day. Every few months, I purge my space and make sure there are no residual ties, gremlins lurking or negative energies around. 


This has made a HUGE difference in the way I feel in general. By choosing not to hold on to anything, it has made it far easier for me to let go of the need to totally control my life, and allow my divine team to assist me.


With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo